Many people will have sex with someone they don’t have romantic feelings for, whether it be a drunken hook-up, a ‘friend with benefits’ or a casual relationship. While that might be sex, it’s not making love. Making love involves a deeper emotional connection that extends beyond just physical intimacy.
It’s an opportunity to communicate a lot of things to your partner, both verbally and non-verbally, including how much you care about them. You might hold them, cuddle, and tell them how wonderful they are. You might kiss them gently or passionately, tousle their hair, and take your time with them. This is what makes making love so special and so different from simply having sex.
Love making requires both parties to be present in the moment and to put in an effort – maybe even more than you might put in for regular sex. You’ll want to make sure that your bedroom is clean and ready, the lights are low or soft music plays, and that you dress in sexy lingerie. You might make a romantic dinner or light a scented candle.
Taking your time also means looking into their eyes and smiling, as well as touching them lightly or lovingly. This is all a part of the experience, and can be very intimate if you’re both into it. You might stroke their hair or lips, comment on something about them that they’re beautiful in or on, or even caress their thighs. This is how you really show your partner that you’re in this together, and it can add a whole other layer of sexual pleasure to the act.
You might also choose to tell them stories about your past, or share a funny memory that makes you both laugh. You might talk about your day and share your thoughts. This is all a part of what makes the love-making experience so special, and it’s often a good sign that you’re in a strong relationship.
This is all what makes making love so different from just having sex. You’re putting in a little extra effort to really feel close to your partner and to let them know how much you care, and this isn’t always easy for all couples. But if you can do it, and if you’re able to stay present in the moment, then you’ll be well on your way to creating that magical connection that you both deserve. After all, what’s more important than love? It’s definitely worth the extra work!