Whether it’s a drunken fling with a stranger, or a hook-up with a ‘friend with benefits,’ many people have slept with someone they don’t have romantic feelings for. That kind of sexual encounter is simply sex, not making love. Making love is more than just sex; it’s about bonding and feeling closer to your partner through the physical act of intimacy.
The best way to make your lover feel loved is to take time to enjoy each other and build anticipation before you get in the bedroom. Engage in foreplay such as touching, cuddling, and kissing to set the mood. During this time, talk to your partner about what you both like and don’t like. This will help you to understand your partner better, and will also show that you care about them.
Once you’re ready to begin, apply lubricant on both of your hands and use them to stroke and fondle your partner. Begin by stroking the head of their penis to create arousal and then move on to the shaft, gently but firmly, using twisting motions. You may want to lick or brush the member as well to add additional sensation. If your partner is comfortable with it, you may even tie them up to show dominance and control.
As you continue to please your partner in bed, don’t stop until they’re as satisfied as you are. You may be tempted to continue with your pleasure until they ejaculate, but this can make them feel rushed and less than desirable. You may also be tempted to go for the harder and deeper pleasures, but this can lead to friction and dissatisfaction. If you’re going for the ultimate climax, take your time and try not to rush it.
You can also tell your partner how much you care by using words during sexual intercourse. Affirmations such as “I adore you all over, inside and out,” or “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” are a great way to keep her in a state of arousal. During this time, eye contact is important; it will deepen the connection between you and enhance your sense of bonding.
When you’re truly making love, your partner will want to be with you in and out of the bedroom. They’ll be looking forward to reconnecting with you and will plan dates to do so. You’ll also find that your partner will be more attentive in the bed. They’ll be more willing to stroke and fondle you, even the parts of your body that they might shy away from.
You can increase the love in your relationship by exploring fantasies together, role-playing, and experimenting with new sexual techniques. It’s also important to communicate with your partner to find out what their needs are in and out of the bedroom, so that you can make sure they’re being met. This will lead to a deeper emotional connection and can help you understand the difference between loving someone and being sexual with them.
