Making love is a more intense and intimate form of sexual intercourse than ‘having sex.’ It involves a certain degree of tenderness (even if your love making is on the rough side!) and a focus on the other person’s needs as well as your own. It’s about finding pleasure for her and helping her to find orgasm. You aren’t just fucking; you are loving her in a way that triggers feel-good chemicals in both of you.
It’s a slower and more drawn out process than sex, and requires a romantic setting or special occasion. It’s also about more than physical intimacy, it’s about emotional connection and sharing a sense of togetherness.
A good place to start is by talking about feelings and sharing thoughts. Then you can move on to foreplay and get her into the mood for sex. A massage, a warm bath, or some slow seduction can all be used to help her relax and unwind before you make love.
During foreplay, pay close attention to her cues. If she seems to be getting bored, slow down and take it easy. Don’t rush or try to force things. If she wants to talk, be sure to listen and let her know you are interested in what she has to say. If she gets excited, it’s fine to give her a lot of oral sex and use lots of slow and deep kissing.
When you have reached the point where she is ready for sex, be sure to use condoms (if necessary) and follow safe sex techniques. Be aware of how much pressure you are applying to her and avoid overdoing it as this can cause her to become uncomfortable and inhibit orgasm. When you are both ready for penetration, go very slowly at first. This will help you to be a better lover by allowing her to enjoy the sensations of sex and reduce the chance of her prematurely ejaculating.
It’s important to remember that if you aren’t feeling passionate about your partner, it will be hard for them to feel the same. So, even if you aren’t in the mood for love-making, make an effort to spend time together laughing and talking about your day or about the future. This will help to create a positive environment that will make it easier for you and your partner to meet each other’s sexual and emotional needs.
Make her feel your love for her. Show her that you want everything about her and she will be more likely to return the favor later on. You can do this by complimenting her, being sweet and by saying “I love you”. These small gestures will show her that you are thinking of her and will boost her confidence in your relationship. You can also ask her what it is that makes her happy and what kind of sex she likes. Knowing this information will help you to be a better lover, and it will also prevent her from becoming bored or having sex for the wrong reasons.
